Be My Escape..

Recently there has been a tugging in my heart and a concious realisation to reach out to other ppl..and yes i know its just normal, being a Christian and wanting to reach out..but this time its serious..its time to change..its time to face my demons and let God into every single area of my life..those dark and dirty little corners..i'm not proud of it..

I need God to change me...

I need to HANG ON to God..

and let go of everything else and make Him the one thing that i rely on..

I've been trying so hard recently to get inspirations and ideas for my freelance projects and my company..and i realised that ALL of my very best work and inspirations come from God..and were at times where i simply let Him in and the rest is history...

so yeah...

even if this makes me lose everything that i have..its hard..its really really hard..

but Jesus,

Use me to reach out and be a blessing and a testimony for you.

"Be My Escape"- by Relient K

I've given up on giving up slowly,

I'm blending in so you wont even know me,

apart from this whole world that shares my fate

this one last bullet that you mention

is my one last shot at redemption

because i know to live you must give your life away

And I've been housing all this doubt and insecurity

and i've been locked inside that house all the while you hold the key

and i've been dying to get out

and that might be the death of me

and even though there's no way of knowing

where to go, I promise I'm going because

I gotta get outta here

I'm stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake

I gotta get out of here

and I'm begging You,

I'm begging You to be my escape

I’m giving up on doing this alone now

Cause I’ve failed and I’m ready to be shown how

He’s told me the way and I’m trying to get there

And this life sentence that I’m serving

I admit that I’m every bit deserving

But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair

And I've been housing all this doubt and insecurity
and i've been locked inside that house all the while you hold the key
and i've been dying to get out
and that might be the death of me
and even though there's no way of knowing
where to go, I promise I'm going because

I gotta get outta here

Cause I’m afraid that this complacency is something I can’t shake

I gotta get outta here

And I’m begging You, I’m begging You,

I’m begging You to be my escape.

I am a hostage to my own humanity

Self detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made

And all I’m asking is for You to do what You can with me

But I can’t ask You to give what You already gave

I fought You for so long

I should have let You in

Oh how we regret those things we do

And all I was trying to do was save my own skin

But so were You

So were You